When we were newlyweds, three years ago, Patricio and I used to go on dates every Tuesday night - mostly because it was matinee night at the theatre around the corner. It was our special night that remained unscheduled from work, school, and friends. Over time, like all long-term relationships, familiarity has made us comfortable. We've made every excuse to stay in, fall into a lazy routine, and anything that remotely resembles a date has become farther and fewer inbetween.
There's a famous quote, by Mignon McLaughlin, that I love: "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."
I think to some, especially to the typical "comittaphobe," that quote might seem dooming. With ever-increasing divorce rates, falling in love with the same person doesn't seem to be the go-to solution. To me, McLaughlin's words incite excitement - I don't want to be in love with anyone but my husband, and I loved falling in love with him for the first time. I've told Patricio that I wish I could forget that I knew him just so that I could fall in love with him again - which admittedly sounds a little morbid.
While I can't repeatedly fall in love with my husband 50 First Dates-style, I've found that making the effort to share new experiences, and to spend meaningful time together allows me to remember why I fell in love with him in the first place, and to find new reasons to love him more. It's easy to forget to make time for the ones that we love, and in doing so, forget how to love them!
This week, we gently reclaimed Tuesdates with homemade tacos, a walk down to the waterfront, and watercolour painting on the rocks. We both enjoyed the evening because we've never painted together before. It was also very therapeutic to paint right on the lake when it was so calm and still.
I'm used to watching Patricio paint, but this is only the second time I've painted since we were married (aside from children's face painting). I was always too impatient to paint or draw as I got older, wanting to be perfect without all the practice. I find it relaxing now as long as I don't have a purpose in mind.
Some of Patricio's cute watercolour doodles. We were using a cheap pad of watercolour paper we bought years ago at a Shoppers Drug Mart.
Here's to falling in love many more times, always with the same person.